7 Quick Moves That Will Get Your Boyfriend Back
When someone's broken up with you, the pain can be debilitating. You can't eat. You can't sleep. All you can really do is think about your ex, and wonder which moves on your part could possibly convince them to come back.
Getting back together becomes your primary goal. It's all you can focus on. And what happens then, unfortunately, is that you OVER-think it.
Lots of people fix their breakups. But when you look at the ones that fail? It's almost overwhelmingly because they ran off and made all the wrong moves.
Hell, some people get back together after doing nothing at all. They ignore their breakup - and their exboyfriend or exgirlfriend - so much that the person misses and wants them back. Breaking up is funny like that. You can accomplish a lot by simply waiting around, rather than make any of the 12 Irreversible Mistakes that will drive your ex screaming in the other direction.
But what if you can't wait? What if you want your ex back NOW, faster than anything?
And also, what can you do while you're waiting out the No Contact phase of the breakup? Are there methods and techniques for accelerating the entire reconciliation process, so that your ex comes running back to you faster than if you did nothing?
Luckily, there are. But make sure read up on ALL of these things before trying them. Because once again, the only thing worse than a bad breakup is one made even more painful.
One that's turned into a giant mess by spinning your wheels in the wrong direction, and making needless mistakes out of sheer desperation.
Below are 7 no-nonsense, no-bullshit moves you can make right after your boyfriend breaks up with you. Each of these will bring your ex that much closer to you, emotionally, mentally, and eventually physically as well. The more of these you can pull off, the faster you can repair your relationship. So enough talking about them, let's go moving:
Accept, Agree, and Walk Away
Your very first move after the breakup is to accept it. This is probably the exact opposite of what you're doing right now, which is fighting against it, arguing for reconciliation, and swearing to "change things" in order to sway your partner into taking you back.
By accepting the breakup you're not say goodbye forever. Think of it as a temporary break. Think of it as mentally manipulating your ex into thinking you no longer care about patching things up. This is crucial, because while you're still battling to keep things going your ex will NEVER let their guard down or open their minds up to anything you have to say.
Agreeing with the breakup is part two of this step. You have to let your ex know it's over by flat out telling them you've seen the light:
"Yeah, I get it now. We are probably better off apart. Seeing other people is the best thing for both of us, so let's part ways while we're still friends."
See what just happened? Not only did you not fight the breakup, you agreed with it AND you sort of counter-rejected your ex. This is tremendous. It sets them on the back foot as far as a lack of confidence, because suddenly it's like you're taking charge of the breakup itself. You grabbed the wheel, and now YOU are the one driving away.
On top of all that, you mentioned "seeing someone else". And no matter how your boyfriend broke up with you, this is something they don't want to envision; not this early after separating from you.
Disconnect From All Social Media
Know what keeps a breakup going? Knowledge. The knowledge that you're still going to be there, should your ex suddenly change his or her mind.
To get this knowledge, your ex WILL be stalking your Facebook page. They WILL be watching your Instagram posts. They WILL be looking for any sort of social activity on your part, that might indicate you're sad, depressed, unhappy, sulking, crying, posting love-quotes and lame song lyrics... all that sort of crap.
Your ex wants to see these things! He would love to know you still want and need them. This makes them stronger. It gives them the ego and confidence boost necessary to move on with their life by seeing other people, and doing other things... all the while knowing you're still "there" in case they want you back.
By not even logging into Facebook or Instagram you're sending a huge message: "I've got better things to do". Your ex boyfriend will go nuts trying to figure out where you've disappeared to. They'll go crazy imagining where you went, what you might be doing, and most important of all, who you might be with.
After a while, you can actually use social media to make your ex jealous again, to the point where they need to hear from you. Those techniques are HERE. Learn them, but also remember they need to be used with the right timing in order to produce the best possible reaction.
Reconstruct Yourself - Emotionally and Physically
Once you've disconnected, it's time to turn your attention inward. Because anything and everything you've been doing to "win" your ex's heart again has probably been wrong.
Nobody wants to see you sulking. No one wants to see you cry. You can't get your ex back through pity, or by guilt-tripping them, or any of that lame crap. Trying to 'remind them' of the old times won't work either, at least not now. Those nostalgia techniques are for later on, once you've fixed the number-one most important aspect of your entire breakup: YOURSELF.
Whatever it takes, you have to heal. You have to stop focusing on the negativity that comes with being dumped, and start working on how you can be positive again. Your boyfriend was once attracted to you because you displayed certain attractive qualities. Right now, you're most likely displaying the opposite of those qualities, and this is why they don't want anything to do with you.
- Confidence - This is the big one. Until you're a confident person again, you'll always look weak. Until you start being sure of yourself - like you were before the breakup, your ex will see you as ridiculously inadequate. Remember, no one wants to 'fix' you. No one wants to hold you or coddle you or take care of you right now. So chin up, stop moping around, and start exuding the confidence of someone who is absolutely, 100% sure of him or herself.
- Independence - No matter how you look at it, independent people are always attractive. They do things, go places, and always rely on themselves rather than others. The opposite of independence is neediness. So examine your past actions, and try to eliminate anything that makes you look needy or desperate.
- Charisma - We all have that one really cool friend who, no matter what, seems to attract followers. This is because that person is a leader. He demonstrates a certain charisma that draws others to them. Charismatic people are outgoing. They are not withdrawn. They are not self-defeating. By allowing yourself to have charisma you're going to find yourself surrounded by positive people. Including, of course, your ex.
- Optimism - Everyone hates a pessimist. No one wants to always hear how 'bad' everything is, even if that person happens to be right. If your whole M/O includes taking a shit on the world everywhere you go, you'll eventually be labeled a downer. So stop it. Be optimistic, even in the face of your breakup. Be positive, and know that things are going to get better. Not just better, awesome. Better than awesome. Positivity breeds MORE positivity. Plain and simple, it's contagious.
- Happiness - Nothing, and I mean NOTHING will drive your boyfriend crazier than seeing you happy after the breakup. This is because it's human nature for your ex to want to see you fail without them. They'd like to believe they were responsible for your happiness. So when you're suddenly smiling and excited and enthusiastic everywhere you go? Your former lover will begin to look at their life, and compare it to yours. And guess what? It won't measure up. They declared themselves the 'winner' of the breakup, yet all of a sudden they feel like the loser.
- Strength - The strongest people have the biggest draw, and these are always the individuals people go to for help or advice. By not demonstrating weakness, by not showing how much the breakup might hurt, you're displaying a crucial inner strength that builds character. Strength is sexy, both in a man and a woman. And yes, physical strength can be sexy too, so make sure you work on that as well.
- Appearance - Yeah, this counts. Especially so in the case of a breakup. Try to envision how your ex first saw you; what you looked like, how you carried yourself. Then get to the gym. Work on your tan. Head out and buy some new clothes, and make sure you look your best. Exercise clears your head, and gets you thinking straight. It also releases endorphins that will make you feel better overall. Looking and feeling your best will build on all of the other 6 traits; you'll feel stronger, more confident, more happy and outgoing and charismatic. All of these things make you more attractive, not just to your former boyfriend, but to everyone else as well.
Rebuild Your Social Life Into Something to Be Feared and Admired
When you've disappeared from your ex's radar, and he can't find you, curiosity becomes overwhelming. What started as rejection becomes a sort of obsession to at least know what you've been doing since they cut you loose.
This is where having an active social life becomes important. Everything your ex sees, from this point on, should be GOLDEN. Your life should be the most amazing mix of fun, friends, trips, and exciting things you never did before while the two of you were together.
This means going out, every night, and having fun. Having a blast, really. Do it in public places with lots of friends; bars, clubs, bowling alleys, pool halls - wherever and whenever you can. Try to show up places you know your ex's friends might see you, so they can report back. And obviously, make sure you look awesome. Make sure you're smiling. Make sure you're the furthest thing from being hurt or depressed, because when your ex sees you happy without them they'll start to feel like they're missing out.
Try Things You Never Did While You Were Together
Ever wanted to go skydiving? DO IT. That amusement park you always wanted to try? GO THERE. Have the most amazing time, and post the most insanely happy pictures on social media (once the first half of the No Contact period is finally over).
If your ex left you because they were bored, or felt like you weren't living up to their vision of who you were, now's your chance to show them what they're missing. You want your life to appear so amazing that your ex feels jealous they're not there to share it with you. You want them to feel almost like they were holding you back. When your former lover starts wondering why you're doing all this stuff you never did before, he will start to see a NEW you. An exciting you. A you that they suddenly want to be a part of again, almost as if they felt cheated the first time around.
Best of all, you're showing independence. Your happiness never depended on this person to begin with; actually, you seem happier without them! This is a kick to your ex's ego. It shakes their confidence in the decision to break up with you, because all of a sudden, leaving someone as exciting as you (to be all alone) doesn't seem like such a great idea after all.
Make Your Ex Jealous by Seeing Other People
A lot of people will refuse this step, simply because they're fearful. They believe that if their ex were to see them (or pictures of them) out with someone else, that person would never want them back again.
The fact is, such a situation has the opposite effect. When your ex sees you 'dating' again, it's like a smack to the face of their own ego. Instantly, everything has changed. The possibility of getting you back - something they were fairly certain they could do at any time - is immediately called into question.
Did you find a new boyfriend/girlfriend? Have you slept with this person yet? Your ex's stomach will be in knots, no matter what point of the breakup you happen to be at.
Suddenly, things have changed. They're not sure they can still have you, even if they wanted you again. You've apparently moved on. You're untouchable. Their comfortable litle one-sided situation dissolves rapidly away.
What happens here is this: you're desirable again. You have VALUE. Obviously someone else wants you, which makes your ex re-examine the reasons why they rejected you in the first place. And if you happen to have moved on before them? That's even worse.
Now obviously, I'm not telling you to run out and sleep with someone. You don't even have to date anybody; just go out with them, have fun, and make sure your ex finds out about it. Casually dating is a great way to help forget about your ex, while drawing them closer at the same time. You get practice getting 'back on the horse', and you instill jealousy in someone who once loved you... and probably still does, on a whole bunch of levels.
Remember; if you're looking for ways to get your boyfriend back you need to look no further than YOURSELF. After all, you were the one who attracted him in the first place.
Therefore you'll be the one singular person who can attract him again.You can follow Anthony Malibu on:
